Introspection

October 17, 2019

Many thoughts, inside we think

We write them in our minds’ black ink

They bleed so deep into the page

That nothing sways them, time or age

Every word we write within

Masks our actions, and our sin

For how can someone sleep at night

If Truth is casting it’s bright light

Showing us our lies, our hates

As secrets, it illuminates

Things we try to hide, disguise

And cover in a bed of lies

Yet we’re so quick to display

When others find themselves astray

Pointing fingers, crying foul

But when it’s them, then they allow

Of all the things I’d like to teach

It is to practice what you preach

Consider this, each time and day

Let actions speak the words you say

A Letter to Our Leaders

October 13, 2019

To every politician, right or left, I beg that you read these words and carefully consider them.

I am writing this because it is necessary, because we simply cannot do this any more. So please understand that all of what I’m about to say is the god-honest, unabridged truth, and is felt by millions of people whom you are supposed to represent.

All of you are ripping this nation apart.

Every single day, people wake up to headline after headline of how monstrous the president is, or how hypocritical the left is. Our media outlets publish nothing whatsoever other than the continued divisive rhetoric of either side. Fox tells America to love Trump and the mission he’s on, and CNN tells America to hate Trump and everything he stands for. That’s the basic gist of every single piece of news we’re constantly fed, day after day after day.

And you know what? Both sides of the aisle are destroying us. Every single one of you do nothing but pander to your base, and throw rocks at your opposition. Trump does it, AOC does it, Pelosi does it, and literally every other person up there in those comfy seats does it. I choose these names because I know they’re the most recognizable ones to us normal, working class Americans – but it applies to all of you. It’s absolutely ridiculous, and it all boils down to one, very simple fact.

You are all, every single one of you, being ruled, inhibited, and otherwise governed by your absolutely, enormously inflated egos. There isn’t one single human being that has entered your arena who is not completely subconsciously controlled by their own vanity, ego, and desire for power. In fact, that’s exactly why you have all gravitated toward your positions in politics to begin with – you, at your most basic, fundamental core, want control. You know it, I know it, and every single person reading this knows it. There is no escaping that fact, because after all, here you are, sitting in Congress, fulfilling that carnal desire of yours. So let’s make that clear before we go any further.

Back to the point. Yes, you are destroying our country. All of you. You’re destroying it with your endless inability to make peace with those who oppose you. It’s absolutely infuriating, to be completely frank. Rather than trying to find a common, middle ground, you have all dug in and instead lob hateful, malicious rhetoric at anyone who threatens your point of view. It’s disgusting behavior, and you should all be ashamed. Your jobs, which by the way were created to serve us, have instead become luxurious positions of power and corruption. And the worst part of it all is that you now use your duly elected power to manipulate and deceive the very people who were kind enough to grant it to you.

I don’t care if this makes you angry. I honestly don’t. Because everyone who reads this knows exactly what I’m trying to say, and hard truth is always what digs at us the deepest. We’re fed up with you. You’ve completely twisted the values that this nation was founded upon, and it’s time to put this to a stop. I can’t do anything myself, because I’m nobody in the grand scheme of things. But you know what? The people can. Now, more than ever, we have the power to communicate en masse, and your authority is treading a very thin line right now whether you want to believe it or not.

I’m tired of watching friendships get ripped apart. I’m tired of hearing about marriages crumbling, and I’m tired of seeing family members be ostracized all in the name of politics. You were supposed to set an example for what a cooperative, legitimately considerate institution should look like. But you’ve completely squandered that opportunity. You’ve become everything that is wrong in this world, and there are literal hundreds of millions of people suffering because of it.

This is a reckoning, if I may say so. It’s an outcry on behalf of every single person in this country who I know wants nothing else but to see a world where people love each other and get along. So please, I beg that you stop all of this hatred and disagreement and start working together like you were supposed to. We cant do this anymore. Something has to change.

And it has to start with you.

Missing Pieces

October 12, 2019

Why must this piece to this puzzle allude

Why doesn’t it fit like I know it should do

Was it carved in the way that it was meant to

Or is it just me that can’t make it conclude

Why can’t I focus on that which I should

Instead of these things which I dream that I could

Why do I always feel misunderstood

I beg that He tell me, I wish that He would

Why must this battle be so far uphill

I pray every day that He grant me the will

To give me the courage and grant me the skill

To give me a purpose that I can fulfill

Incomplete works still continue to haunt

And sadly it seems I write in the wrong font

I dearly desire my life’s confidant

To find the last piece to this puzzle I want

Darkness

October 9, 2019

In darkness these thoughts have made into their place

They’ve stolen my mind and hold it in embrace

After the curtains fall there’s a new face

That torments and consumes my every thoughts’ space

This strength is a weakness, it follows me so

It’s grip only tightens when asked to let go

Constantly clawing, as if my shadow

And nothing I do can restrain it, I know

So sorely I long to be rid of my fate

For the burdens I bear seem to be far too much weight

Twisting and turning, I wish they’d stay straight

For solace I’m searching, for calm I await

In darkness these thoughts have made into their place

And there’s nothing to stop it from starting to race

Stop. I sincerely want one day of grace

Stop. There’s only so much I can face

For Better or Worse

October 5, 2019

Sitting in solitude, lonely, I know

Glancing and gazing out of this window

I wish that the hands of this clock would move slow

But everyone seems to have somewhere to go

Why must every journey turn into a race

Why do we seem always have something to chase

Spending life sprinting and quickening the pace

When we could instead make the most of our place

Donning these things that we don’t even need

So we can catch up, get ourselves up to speed

Is it all vanity, is it all greed

Or is it the way we’ve been taught to succeed

Think of your values, what things do you want

Are they sincere or just things you can flaunt

Words are all words, no matter the font

Their meanings don’t change be you poor, debutante

New Beginnings

October 3, 2019

Some things are wanted

Some things are earned

Some things are instinct

Some things are learned

No one is born

With silver in hand

They may think they do

But don’t own their land

Life, it’s a battle

Fought by warriors, for ground

No parcel is given

No acre is found

Nothing is owed in this journey we’re on

And kings can be toppled by anyone’s pawn

Pride, it dost come ‘fore the vain who will fall

As no one escapes a true reckoning call

Righteousness might be the flag that you bear

But everyone knows there’s no substance in there

Vanity’s victim, though maybe you’d care

If only your mirror made you self-aware

But that’s how it goes

This story I tell

And those who preceded

Knew all too well

Nothing they said would be thought of until

Their bones had been buried, and yet even still

So many things they wrote ended up true

And yet here we are, still saying “well you”

Nobody gets that the issues within

For nobody wants to admit that they sin

We live and we laugh in a world; make- believe

Then we still wonder why we can’t achieve

Achieve all the things which we claim that we want

Ironically by our own ghost are we haunt

Truth is not easy, such burden to bear

Yet in its embrace we’d see how much we share

Some things are wanted

Some things are earned

It’s time that we listen

And forget what we’ve learned

Rhythm & Rhyme

September 29, 2019

Some-one told me, that-my-written poetry

Is hard to read and hard to get the rhyme

So I took a quick glance, a punctuation dance

And decided I would help them this one time

It’s LETters, you see, that make UP my poetry

But the rhythm might be hard to figure out

So I’ll try my very best, and unLIKE all of the rest, I’ll count the syllables and make them cast no doubt

For when writers write a rhythm

There’s a certain algorithm

That we stick to because IF we don’t we die

And that would really suck

Because I’d BE like “what the fuck?”

We followed every rule and every lie

So here it goes again

I hope you BROUGHT your own ink pen

But if you didn’t, stress the cap words as you try

Rise Up

September 29, 2019

My wardrobe’s the flyest

My partisan bias

Is painted on each pleat and cuff

I look at my dresser

Think “I’m an impresser”

My donors, they can’t get enough

They worship me, yes they do

Sing to me, yes it’s true

Follow through thick and through rough

Blindly believing

The things I’m achieving

The truth is not what they discuss

The truth is that each aisle

Uses the same style

Deceit and control is their love

So to left and to right

I say to you tonight

Meet in middle, and rise up above

Look at Me

September 25, 2019

Time, its not so timeless

And things never seem to change

Who we are and what we do

It’s stone, not rearranged

We live, we laugh, we love, we play

We fight, we kill, we fear, we hate

Never has it mattered what it is, the day and age

Things are all that separate the volume from its page

Do not look down on those who came before, they were the same

The things you have do not make you a wiser man than they

So it’s told, the times of old were better than today

For all that ever mattered was with whom at night you lay

Take a look at all the things that now you do portray

If only you, I tell unto, I pity what you say

Proverbs 23:7

September 21, 2019

Come here, close, but please be kind

As I let you tiptoe through my mind

I’ll show you all the things I hide

In places that you’d never find

These shelves aren’t empty

Stocked with care

They hold my burdens

Weight I bear

Hidden hallways, secret doors

This palace has so many floors

Thoughts live life locked up in here

Some, I wish, would disappear

I care not for what others say

For at the end of every day

This mirror is all that I need

To know who’s looking back at me

Sleep with solace, every night

Knowing for what things you fight

It’s writ in Proverbs, twenty three

As man thinks, so is he

Vanity

September 19, 2019

Fame is not what it once was

It did not do what it now does

The days of old are gone at last

For that which was has long since passed

Those who seek its key and door

Do not know what they’re fighting for

Expecting glee, they rush inside

And loneliness is all they find

They dream of being on a stage

But empty inkwells pen no page

An audience can not do good

If there’s no message understood

Long ago, we fought for pride

Yet now we all know, deep inside

That those who chase for naught but me

Seek nothing more than vanity

Work in Progress

September 14, 2019

Someone told me “Find a wife and settle down”

I looked at them and said “Okay, why don’t we talk and break this down”

They cleared their throat and said “Ahem. Here is the righteous path of man”

I cleared my own and said “Hold on. What if I’m not like all all of them?”

They scratched their head and said instead, “But this is how we all do things”

I looked at them and, with a grin, said “We also used to bow to Kings”

I told them that the way things were are not the way that things are now

I told them that some people need to do things before settling down

Just because a person doesn’t have a kid or a big house

Does not mean that the person is a lessor one without a spouse

Sometimes people really want to do things they’re remembered for

That doesn’t make them magically some kind of monster to abhor

So cool it with “You’re single man, what on earth is wrong with you?”

Because it’s so annoying when you’re judgement gets the best of you

Understand that people are dynamic and don’t fit a mold

‘Cause if you don’t so help me God, I’ll smack you as my beer, they hold

Sinless Stone

September 14, 2019

All these people, all these poses

Looking through a lens of roses

Spinning, swirling, they’re all dancing

It’s their minds they are romancing

We all go out, play the game

At night we know we’re all the same

Doing things we say we don’t

And then pretend and say we won’t

Yet you and I both know the truth

So step in my confession booth

Tell me things you want to say

That might make your guilt go away

Tell me what things that you hold

Deep inside your lonely soul

Then I’ll tell you all of mine

As we both see we’re the same kind

That there’s nothing we should fear

And guards should vanish; disappear

For all who live will commit sin

It’s how things work, this world were in

Next time a finger points at you

I say, this is what you should do

Get them in a room, alone

And show them this here Sinless Stone

The Most Important Thing I’ve Ever Written

September 13, 2019

Something’s happening, and a lot of people aren’t realizing it. They can feel it, sure; but they aren’t quite able to put their finger on the sensation that they’re experiencing. So let me try to do it for you. I’m going to describe the phenomenon to which I refer in one, concise, statement:

Your consciousness is becoming one with everyone else’s.

I know. Sounds crazy, dunnit? But if you truly absorb what I’m attempting to articulate at the moment, you will realize that I’m being deadly serious. So before you dismiss this as the random bantering of a metaphorical space cadet, please allow me to explain.

Much of what I’m about to tell you is going to sound absurd. That word is emboldened to try and illustrate the fact that just because something sounds crazy to you – doesn’t mean it’s crazy. Because again, I’m fully aware that this will, at first glance, sound nuts. So we need to acknowledge that before we get into this. That way, hopefully you’ll (paradoxically) see that since I understand that, you’ll have an easier time empathizing and realizing that what I am saying is not, in fact, absurd.

Basically, if I’m normal enough to acknowledge how bizarre this is going to sound…then surely I must be grounded enough to deserve at least a small handful of sane credibility.

Phew.

Back to the topic at hand. The first thing I want to address can be summarized by a simple question.

Who are you?

A mundane, rudimentary query, I know. But seriously…think about it. Who are you? What does it mean for you to be reading these very words right now; to have the ability to discern what thoughts, ideas, and concepts are going through my mind at this very moment? In other words…

What does it mean to exist?

Well, I’ve put a lot of thought into that question. A hell of a lot more than most people probably do, if I may say so myself. And to be frank, the only answer I find myself able to come up with is that I have absolutely no clue, whatsoever, what it means to exist – but I’ll be damned if that doesn’t stop me from trying to figure it out.

Which brings me back, again, to my point.

Considering the fact that I’ve begun this process by acknowledging the possibility that I’m nothing more than a speculative ignoramus, I can come to only one conclusion to that question. And it’s quite simple.

We are our thoughts.

What do I mean by that (sorry if that was anti-climatic)? Well, I’m glad you asked, because I’m going to try my best to elaborate. You see, humans (and the human conditions which afflict us all) are enormously complex vessels. We’re born, naturally, with a kagillion unique characteristics that enable us to self-identify. That is to say, we’re all special (not rolling my eyes, I promise). This is a point with which I doubt anyone will take issue. We’re all unique, are we not?

And yet, if you really sit down and think about it…we’re all the same. We all go through good times, hard times, embarrassing times, and proud times, no? Truthfully, the only things separating any of us from each other are the exclusive-to-our-own-plight-in-life situations, which to be perfectly frank, we all have to deal with. Considering that, they really shouldn’t matter in terms of validating ourselves to other people (since that’s what we want, right?)

Ahem.

So, back to the point (for the third time now, I think? I’m not keeping score, I’m sorry). If we are to examine, closely, the things I’ve mentioned in this wall of words above, it shouldn’t take very long to discern the fact that everyone, ever, has shit going on in their lives with which other people can (with an almost eerie sense of congruence) relate. It could be money problems, career problems, familial/marital problems, the-neighbors-dog-shat-on-my-recent-and-meticulously-manicured-lawn problems…you get the point.

We’re all going through shit.

And that’s just it. I’m fairly certain that all of you reading this has recognized, in one way or the other, that literally everyone on the planet has an imperfect life. And we’re beginning to wake up to that coffee-smelling fact. It doesn’t matter what walk of life you find yourself tiptoeing over…there will always be actual millions of people who are sharing your exact same struggles. The challenge is simply to find them, and to be open enough with each other that you both mutually understand that by judging someone based upon the transgressions, misguidances, and otherwise misfortunes of a person’s past is the quickest ticket to a life of loneliness & obscurity ever.

And that’s exactly what I mean when I say our consciences is slowly becoming one. We’re beginning to understand and empathize with each other, because we’re seeing all of these things people have been going through via social media and the internet. The ability to share thoughts and ideas en masse, like we can now, is without a doubt the most game-changing component of societal congruence the Earth has ever seen.

So allow me to share a toast to the human condition, and everything else that we’re fortunate enough to experience together in this once-in-a-billion-years era of time.

Because without a lot of you guys…I’d still be thinking I’m alone in the world.

The Saint of Augustine

September 10, 2019

The Saint of Augustine

I don’t care if people like me or if people think I’m wise

Writing is the only place that I can go without disguise

The ink that my quill writes with are the tears that pour down from my eyes

I pulled it’s feather from my wing because the other’s feather lies

Searching for a solace that’s serene is something that I seek

And I will fly and paint the sky until I find the things I speak

Unknown doorways open up revealing all that is unique

I soar through all the stars at night in wonder and such grand mystique

Home is here inside this world of words and all the things between

I once was lost but now am found by things I never thought I’d mean

Pen and pad are wed tonight under the Saint of Augustine

Kings are rarely righteous rulers when they’re left without a Queen

My Little Dog

September 9, 2019

My little dog, he follows you

He mimics all the things we do

He wonders why there’s things out there

Why he has nothing to compare

He watches fights at the dog park

He hears the hounds all howl and bark

He asks them why they disagree

They look at him, then look at me

They do not answer what he asks

Instead, they they show him all the tasks

All the things they’re told to do

As if they’re angry, because of you

They tell him that they do not want

To write their stories in one font

They want to live the life they see

The one that they create, decree

And as my little dog lays down

He says what things today, he found

“From all of the things that I see

I’m thankful that we live life free”

My Plea

September 8, 2019

All these thoughts that hide inside are more than just things in our mind, they’re things that we all can confide and they deserve to be defined.

Living in this world we’ve clayed has made us rotten, so decayed, that no one seems to know the answer to “how is a smile made?”

Nothing matters anymore, besides our ego and our score, the tally that makes up each time we prove ourself right as we climb. Climbing up to heights that give, nothing more than ways to live, ways that dictate what is right no matter what the others might. No matter for what others think, and if you get the point I ink, you’ll see that what I try to say is that there has to come a day. A day when people can repent from all the judgement that they’ve sent, a day when people understand that this is my land, and your land.

Nothing comes of sticks and stones, and as they play the Game of Thrones, the masses sit and suffer them, and cater to their every whim. The time has come to take the helm, to change how we control this realm, the time has come to give things back to those who foster what they lack. Kindness, love, empathy. This is what makes you and me. These are things we all must taste, for if we don’t, it’s all a waste. Waste of life and energy, I whisper “Between you and me, everything, it must be changed – our structure must be rearranged.”

Life was not meant to be hard, and if you’d just lower your guard, you’d realize that this world is ours, to shape as we shoot for the stars.

Stars are what we need at night. I’m sorry, but I know I’m right. If we would just let go of hate…imagine what we could create.

Peeping, Pulling

September 7, 2019

Peep. Pull. Tell me I should try to start writing songs

They say that I could make money writing all these wrongs

I don’t really think that anybody seems to understand

I don’t do this to make money, I do it for the things I stand

Nothing that I’ve done has been done to make dime or dollar piece

Nothing that I’ve done has been done to be more than my release

Every word I write at night is written to alleviate

The pain I feel, it’s how I heal, I don’t care if you think it’s great

Or if you think it’s anything that you would buy and start to read

Because there’s not a lot in life that I can say I truly need

Give me someone I can trust and share all of my secrets with

Who won’t just sit there judge and make me wish that I’dev pled the fifth

Make it simple, make it right

And when we all lay down at night

It matters not what we have read

For that which matters, shares our bed

Take tonight; appreciate

Make things right and shed the hate

Love, it’s there to hold onto

Let go the world, as it guides you

Memories

September 6, 2019

A challenge, it should not be to

Find someone to see things through

Sharing life with only one

For that’s what all the wolves have done

Till death we part, they howl and cheer

With a new litter every year

The alpha finds his alpha mate

To spend his life and share his fate

What forces make it hard for us

To find the one we know we trust?

Is it so easier to say

I’m human, sorry, ‘tis our way?

Why was this harsh life crafted so?

Where people come, and people go

Where we fall victim to false pride

For I know, you know, deep inside

Naught is guaranteed in life

And if a man should find a wife

They should love with heart and soul

For we all know life takes a toll

This journeys not an easy one

And when it is all said and done

There’s only one thing our soul sees

Our shared, and cherished, memories

Politicians: Analyzing Who They Really Are

September 5, 2019

First of all, let’s all acknowledge the one thing I KNOW on which we can all agree: our nation’s “leaders” are acting more childish as of late than a class of second graders trying to decide who gets to pick first for their P.E. class’s dodgeball tournament.

That is to say…they’re embarrassing us.

For the longest time, I’ve been trying my absolute damnedest to discern who the hell actually cares about any of us, and who’s just in it because they obsess over ego, control, and attention. Because by now, I’m pretty sure we all get it; the vast majority of “public servants” gravitate toward the field merely due to the fact that their fundamental character traits drive them to seek out such things. I mean let’s be real here…if any of these embarrassments to humanity were sincere and honest about their desire to help people, they’d be more focused on actually bringing us together rather than incessantly berating everyone who disagrees with them.

So I thought about that for awhile. I wanted to try and figure out who really is doing this for the right reasons. More than anything, I wanted to find a tangible, observable reason that helps me believe that a person actually means what they say.

At first, I was like “well that’s an enormously stupid idea, considering the fact that the entire game is to make sure everything about you screams sincerity, which ironically is one of the least sincere approaches to all of this since it’s just a facade (which is the antithesis of sincerity), but I digress. Point is, I wanted to try and come up with a way to tell who’s who.

So after making many trips to my mind palace in search of this theoretical metric of not-full-of-shittedness, I finally came upon an idea. An idea, at least to me, that could somewhat accurately make such a distinction.

To make a long story short, I decided that I would dig deep into these folks’ online rhetoric. Because if you read the subtext and actually try to peel back all the layers of human interaction, you’ll find that it’s actually quite easy to discern whether or not someone means the things they say, or if they’re just saying what they think will make them sound more appealing.

Basically what I’m saying is that this helped me gauge whether a person is driven by genuine conviction (which is good), or their own self-aggrandizing ego. The rules are simple: listen to how they speak to and address other human beings.

Really, that’s all there is to it.

You see, at the end of the day, we should want our representatives to embody all that is good in us, right? Which, of course, means that our “leaders” should be spending their time relentlessly trying to find a common ground, rather than berating the other side for fostering beliefs that conflict with their own. That’s the whole point, is it not? Of government, I mean. We didn’t just magically come up with the concept of a single entity to dictate proper behavior out of nowhere, right? Of course we didn’t. So if the masses are expected to honor this contract we created so long ago (and btw I would love to know who originally came up with the idea so I could punch them in the face, but w/e), shouldn’t they be acting the way we elect/tell them to act?

Anyway, back to the point. Basically, I realized that learning who a person really is can be somewhat accomplished by their dialogue with people. And the formula is wonderfully simple: if they speak to people disrespectfully, condescendingly, or in an otherwise smug fashion, they’re more than likely the bad type I aforementioned. Because a smart, sincere person would realize that no benefit, at all, comes out of treating people like crap. Literally the only thing it accomplishes is the satisfaction of one’s ego.

So let’s look at some examples, shall we? Here are some honest-to-god, objective opinions I’ve formulated based solely on their social media habits (sorry, but if we aren’t able to know them personally, that’s pretty much all we got in terms of material we can use to position our perspectives of them).

Let’s start with Trump, because duh.

Look at that first sentence. The “incompetent mayor”. Now ask yourself…was it really necessary to belittle him in such a way? How, exactly, does that type of statement serve to unify people? A point, by the way, we need to all grasp:

Leadership, by definition, is about bringing people together – not separating them apart.

And that’s exactly what that pointless jab in the ribs does. It splits people apart, because now, anyone who might support the mayor is now being alienated by a completely useless insult.

Let’s move on.

Oh yeah. You knew she was coming, I know. So let’s apply the same logic here.

“Try to keep up.”

Um…okay? Let’s give her the benefit of the doubt. Let’s say her main point was a solid one. Now tell me, what good does it do to add that little wrenching fingernail at the end? Don’t answer that, because I’ll tell you: none. The answer is none. No good at all comes from such an obnoxious, inflammatory remark. And this girl’s feed is loaded with these types of examples. To be totally honest, she’s kind of an asshole if you look at things objectively (which you should always do).

For the sake of brevity, I’ll just do one more. And believe me, this is one of those “practice what you preach” moments, because I personally get annoyed af by this chick. But, as I said, we must remain objective if we are to be fair.

I thumbed through her Twitter pretty hard, and to be totally honest, the overwhelming majority of her posts were catered toward actual policy and her own convictions. So as much as I’m sure plenty of people will disagree, my unbiased opinion is that she really does want to do the right things. Sure, we might disagree with her as to what those things are, but imo she isn’t as married to her ego as the other two dunces I mentioned are.

So that’s basically it. I know this will likely seem stupid to many of you, but I really do think that you can learn a lot about someone based off their online interactions. You just have to make yourself aware of the message behind the message and see who actually respects humankind.

Above all, please put an effort into using your best judgment. Don’t just listen to what you’re told to believe.