“Psst. Hey, MP!”
“Yeah?”
“Don’t you think we should get rid of that unicorn thing? He sure is a crappy server.”
Back in the Tower of Management, the Lenghornian higher ups collude with one another. Speaking at a whisper, the District Manager and the local manager attempt to conceal their true intentions for the team.
“Who, Xavier?! Of course not! He’s too valuable on the Equal Employment list! You know we’ve got to maintain an image of non-discrimination! No, we must keep that rainbow unicorn on the roster! I’ll be damned if I have to put up with that Equal Unicornist Rights group again.”
“Good point, district manager. Good point. You are so wise, indeed. Say, weren’t we talking about who we intend on letting go?”
“Yes, I believe we we’re.”
“Well I believe I have the perfect candidate. He goes by the name of James. He is a cook that everyone seems to like, and nobody appears to find fault with. In fact, it’s even said that he might actually have genuine feelings for his offspring. We believe it is a girl.”
“NAY!” Shouts the district manager. “We cannot allow these ‘feelings’ to run rampant in our kitchen! We must oust this feeling-haver for the good of the realm!”
“Yes, indeed. We must oust him.” The local manager says, turning to look over the hunch on his back. “And perhaps then we will have achieved our goal: a team of line cooks who are TOTALLY BRAINLESS! MUAHAHAHA!!!!”
“But wait!” The district manager shrieks. “Alas! There is Taylor and Chris. And Joel, I think.”
“Ah, you are right.” The local manager sneers. “We must find a way to be rid of them too.”
“Its true. Only then will we have the brainless team we so desire.” The district manager says, slowly closing the “How to be a Robot” training handbook he has in his hand.
How the World Should Work 