The Lenghornian Revolt Returns: Pt 8


“Um, excuse me?” Asks Norman the Steed, looking up at Bobby with a grimace.

“Apologies, my love.” Bobby the Brave says. “For I meant Woah, please. As in Woah! We have arrived at our destination.”

Unsaddling his faithful steed, Bobby the Brave has arrived at the one place that will make certain that the Crouton Catapult and Battering Ham will be unstoppable: Cedric the Blacksmith’s.

As the pair approaches the stone bastions of Cedric’s keep, the smell of the legendary Keep’s Kush seeps through the open veins of his stone and mortar walls. The thick, grey mist can be seen wriggling it’s way out of the open windows littering the side of the edifice.

“My dear, breathe not the seepings of the Keep’s Kush, for it will render you useless.” Bobby says to his steed. “The bards tell of Cedric’s concoctions in their songs. They have the ability to make one forget entirely their task at hand, making them instead burst out in laughter at the most menial of things. Beware, my love.”

Nodding in acknowledgment, Norman carefully approaches the vast wooden door of Cedric’s keep. Being careful to tiptoe around the misty clouds of Kush smoke, the two bang on the front door, hoping to catch the blacksmiths attention. After several seconds of nothingness, Bobby becomes impatient, looking at the open window to the right of the wooden door, shouting inside.


Waiting for a response, Bobby and Norman stand at the front door, motionless. Its clear that no one has heard their call. Bobby tries once more.


“Wussup pimpin’?”

Out of nowhere, an incredibly relaxed, smiling face looks down at them from the open second floor window, interrupting Bobby.

“You need sumthin?”

Grinning, Bobby the Brave ties his steed to the post outside, then makes his way into Cedric’s keep.

“My friend! It has been ages since I last enjoyed your botanical offerings!” Bobby shouts as he climbs the stairs to join Cedric.

“Ages? Far too long my brotha. Bring it in, let’s get you right.” Cedric says, handing Bobby an enormous oblong, white paper with something green rolled on the inside.

“Alas!” Bobby shouts. “I would love to partake in your Keep’s Kush, but I have pressing matters to which I must attend!”

“Well dayum.” Cedric says. “What needs attending to?”

“The siege weapons I have stationed outside. I must use your forge to strengthen them. With the combined strength of your forge’s upgrades and the legendary forces still within, the Battering Ham and Crouton Catapult will be more than enough to destroy Slug’s oppressive regime. I have been told that he is attempting to corrupt poor Kelsey, and we must not allow that. We must oust him!!”

“You need to use my forge? You can forge allllllll you want, my brotha.” Cedric says, his eyes half open in a state of elation that only Keep Kush can provide.

“Many thanks, my friend.” Bobby says, making his way down to Cedric’s forge.

As Bobby reaches the bellows of Cedric’s Keep, he makes his way to the back of the room. Nestled in the corner is a large wooden door leading to the exterior of the keep, giving him access to the siege weapons he has brought with him. Opening the door, he hurries out to lead Norman and the weapons into the forge below.

“Hold it still, my love!” Bobby shouts, as he hammers into the nose of the Battering Ham.

Hours upon hours go by, until Bobby is drenched in sweat and unable to hammer anymore. Stepping back and viewing his work, he smiles at the gleaming steel tip of the Battering Ham and strengthened Crouton Catapult, which now is more like a T-Bone Trebuchet.

“Yes.” Bobby says, oozing with happiness. “These weapons will surely destroy anything Slug decides to put up. Quickly my love, back to the Lenghornians!”

Mounting Norman, Bobby makes his way back to the server village after thanking Cedric the blacksmith for his services.


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