Okay, dog, I love you bro
But there are some things you must know
So please don’t take this the wrong way
They’re just some things I have to say
Please stop yawning in my face
Your breath is worse than cans of mace
It’s so bad that I bet somehow
One day you’ll singe off my eyebrow
Also, stop walking at night
Across my laptop when I write
You broke the mouse pad already
And squished down half the number keys
Oh, and when I’m deep in sleep
Stop staring at me like a creep
It’s so weird when I wake to see
Your glare as you breathe heavily
And one more thing, last saved for best
Stop standing on my freaking chest
I get it, you want to wake me up
But don’t forget who’s boss here, pup