How the World Should Work

Human behavior has become my interest, it’s no secret. Its fun to look out at the world and see what reality we’ve crafted for ourselves. Here’s one I recently realized that made me laugh.

The pants dance.

Yes, the battle of the sexes has been waged since the dawn of time (thanks a lot, Eve….jk don’t throw the apple core at me). If there is ONE thing that we have all become abundantly aware of, its that men are insecure about height, and that women are insecure about weight.

Kick and scream alllllll you want, but what I speak is true and you know it. Now, considering this, I was recently on the phone with a friend and we were chatting about pant sizes for some reason. No idea how we got there, but we got there. Well, this friend is a female, so I was attempting to unlock the secrets of the 0s, the 2s, 4s…like, what sorcery is this?

We men, you see, are pragmatic (see: practical). We simply say: “Hey! How many inches is yo legs? 32? Word. What about that circumbro? 34? Truth.” Bam. There you have it. a 34/32. Done. Don. Donadon (extinct dinosaur).

But go across the aisle? Men will find themselves in a sea of confusing numbers meant to represent different fittings and such. Kind of like shoe sizes.

Aaaaaand here’s the underlying human behavioral component that no one wants to talk about that extrapolates the entire fashion industry. It’s simple, really. Women just don’t want folks to know their precise measurements.

Don’t kill me. Just telling the truth. Peeps never seem to think about this stuff, ya know? And it’s okay to. It helps us understand each other and who we are at our basic, core levels. So technically, we should embrace this frame of thought. Because if you ask ME…I’d rather be accepted for who I truly am.