I Heard That!

Majestic Mr Baxter

He’s back, and don’t you know

His paws, they hide in this car ride

As he waits to steal the show

See, we’ve discussed how we must trust

This pup, for up is down

And backwards god is dog, I say

When written in this town

Some may scoff, but they’re just lost

Their blaspheme born of old

Olden times of weaker rhymes

Not those this Baxter told

But that’s okay, cause they’re just gay

In happiness context

So no offense, just recompense

As PC is deflects

“You mean deflected?”

No my lord, I thought the rules were clear

Poetic license allows for such

It’s meaning ‘twas so near

“Hmm. Okay. I shall allow”

Why thank you, canine beast

You are so kind, and oh so wise

To grant a writer’s leash

“Mm hmm, yes. Now do be gone”

Of course Lord, as you wish

Before I go, shall I just throw

This fish into your dish?

“Waaaait a tick. You say fish?”

I did my liege, the best

“Well you should know your tithes must grow”

“And fish should fill my chest”

Say no more, we’re all here for

Your happiness, you see

And there’s no way we secret pray

You one day set us free

“Hold on, what? What’s that you say?

“Did you just bitch and moan?”

Of course not lord! I would never

It must have been the phone

“Hmm. Alright. But just this night”

“Next time it best be fixed”

And it will, you’ll see it still

(I bet he can’t learn tricks)

“What’s that you say?!”

Wait, who me?

“Yes you, I swear I heard…”

I’m sorry Lord, the pipes down here

Make noise, make hearing blurred

“I see. Okay. I’m hearing things.”

Fear not, (for you are fat)

“Now hold on!”

You heard me wrong

I said just look at that!

“At what?” Right there!

The time, my liege

The clock, above the chair

You must eat your morning treat

(And brush your mangy hair)


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