Place Your Vet

Mr. Baxter, he loves his life

So much so, he took a knife

Looked down at his abdomen

And said “Know what? Screw this, I’m in”

I looked at him, puzzled of course

Because I’m fairly sure discourse

Is capable among we men

Not dogs, you know? Only humans

So after getting over that

I blinked my eyes, and he said “Matt,”

“There is something inside me”

“I need it out, like right now, G”

So naturally, I nod my head

‘I’m in’, oh that’s what you had meant

But wait a sec, that point, let’s shelf

You plan to surgery yourself?

“I do,” he barked, perfect English

And then I heard this sound, *wapish*!

This lil dog had took his leash

And tied a tourniquet, ‘oh sheesh’

Come here dude, put that aside

There are people, I confide

Who do this very thing for you

So put that down, crazy cuckoo

Let us get you to a vet

Who knows how this table is set

I respect your gall, okay?

Just listen to what they will say

They have trained for ‘zactly this

So you can whine and moan and hiss

None of that will ever change

That they arrange, then rearrange

Trust in them, and you’ll be glad

The best de-sidge you ever had

Thank them when they finish you

Without you dog, tf I’d do?

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