I’m wedded to Words, yes I’m smitten with love
But like any such marriage, we fight
Sometimes it gets tense, and push comes to shove
As they shout, “Don’t give me your bullshit tonight!”
Of course that’s unfair, Words just don’t understand
Just like any ole husband or wife
Its worked to the bone, this here writing hand
Far too much for that “editing” life
Why can’t Words just listen, do what I say
And tidy things up on their own?
I’m only one man, and its been a long day
Must I do so much work all alone?
As carpal tunnel sets in, Words just lounge and relax
Can’t even say “Good job today, Matt”
Oh its cool Words, I got this, ya’ll just lay on your backs
Like I’m hitched to a fat fucking cat
Hell, I even invent those new friends that you like
“Words Night Out” exists ‘cause of ME
The least you could do is be more sportsmanlike
And help edit occasionally
I mean how hard can it be? Just shuffle your feet!
One step and that loose screw is tight
My spelling is solid, my grammar’s is neat
Its not like it’ll take you all night
But whatever I guess, I know they think I overbear
I truly feel marriage is great
I just get so worried they might have an affair
With that douchebag songwriter I hate
How the World Should Work 